I wasn't a fat kid. I didn't actually become fat until I was an adult, but I feared becoming fat so much that I became bulimic when I was twelve. I also thought that I was fat because I wasn't stick skinny. I have the kind of hips and thighs that would never allow me to be perceived as thin, but I don't have the "rack" to match, so I would never be perceived as the coveted "curvy" body type either.
However, I've been told I was ugly from a very young age.
I've never been able to see myself as normal, let alone attractive in any way. I've always seen myself as hideous. It's led me to allow myself to be treated in absolutely wretched ways for the sake of a warped kind of "positive" attention.
At least I've learned enough self-respect that I tend to avoid the people who will use another person in that fashion now.
This was written in response to a post by Virgie Tovar.
http://www.ravishly.com/2017/01/12/take-cake-ugliness-myth
~The Cheese Hath Grated It~
