I can work at this point, and I have my moments of happiness, but really the depression never leaves. Even when I have hypomania (I have type 2 bipolar disorder), the sadness is still just beneath the surface.
All my life I heard how I should just "snap out of it", "Stop feeling that way", "quit looking for attention," and "so many people have it worse than you." It can be a lonely road when you're like me.
So, I'm on Facebook (a platform I have a like/strong dislike relationship with.) I'm chartley65. You can give me a friend request if you want. I work a lot, I don't have chat on, and I'm terrible about checking my messages, but if I see that you posted anything, I'll likely respond. I try to be supportive of other people walking the path.
~Cie~
2 comments:
I remember someone once close to me suffering from depression. I knew it was the real deal as the person in question never let ill-health determine her life. She was a strong, resolute individual who saw off pneumonia, childbirth and a series of chest infections with not one murmur of self-pity. As soon as she was diagnosed with depression it was amazing the number of people who thought she should simply 'snap-out-of-it.' If only it were that simple.
Physically speaking, I'm one of those people who will work till I collapse. I don't take sick days. I'm a wimp when it comes to needles because I have terrible veins, and when people are digging for those veins, it hurts, but I grin and bear it, or at least bear it, or at least try not to puke on them or pass out.
Right now I'm smack in the middle of a hypomanic phase, which is when I tend to take on too many obligations. Then when the depressive phase hits, I just want to kill myself because I don't want to do any of it.
I got accused of being lazy and flaky so often when I was growing up. Even now, I berate myself for taking naps, even though I don't have any kind of a real sleep schedule.
At this point, I highly doubt there are very many actually "lazy" people. It's a terrible word. I try not to use it.
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