Unusual Gravestones: Hollywood Cemetery, Richmond VA

I love old cemeteries. I find them both peaceful and interesting. Here are some beautiful and unique memorials, filmed by Wanda Kaluza.

~Gretyll~

The Roma and Prejudice

French citizens protest the refusal of Champlain's mayor to bury a deceased Roma infant

The Roma and Prejudice

The Roma people have always faced controversy and prejudice. Earlier this year, Christian Leclerc, the mayor of Champlain, refused to bury a two month old infant of Roma descent in the Champlain cemetery. His decision prompted a public outcry.

Leclerc cited lack of burial space, stating that "priority is given to those who pay taxes."

The majority of Roma live in makeshift shanty towns with little to no access to public amenities.

In the case of the deceased infant, Richard Trinquier, mayor of Wissous, granted burial for the deceased infant, stating that the decision to do so was "a question of humanity."

~Cie~

The Minoans: Ancient Civilization of Crete

Greece/Crete Istro

Beautiful piano music and a relaxing beach scene. One complaint: I really need this to go on for a minimum of 15 minutes, an hour would be preferable.

~Illsa~

Stoicism Is Not The Same As Acceptance

My son and I appear to be dealing with Lafayette's death well on the surface. We aren't bursting into tears. We're going on with our daily routines. I'm able to put a smile in my voice when I talk on the phone. My mother would be proud of my stoicism.

In reality, we aren't doing well.

My son usually drinks a beer or two every few days. The same two cases of beer sat waiting to be drunk for several months. 

When I visited today, I'm pretty sure in retrospect that he was hung over. We were going to take care of banking. He said "let's do it tomorrow." I asked him if he wanted me to make him anything to eat. He said no, brushed his teeth, and went back to bed.

One case of beer was entirely gone, and the other has only two bottles left.

I can't drink. But I haven't been sleeping well at all, and when I do, I end up on the lower astral. I have been having a lot of problems with sleep paralysis. I have also been having trouble sensing Gem's presence.

Gem and I got a lot of writing done, and there were junctures when I could feel his hand on my back. He said he isn't angry with me at all, but I think I really hurt him when I said that I missed Lafayette so much that I would not only trade all my other cats (whom I do love, but what I had with Lafayette was incredibly special) I would trade the time I've had with Gem, even though it has not only been precious to me, it's been therapeutic.

Gem is very sensitive. He's never felt like he's anybody's number one, and when he felt like he was mine, it made him really happy. I'm very sorry I hurt him and I'm glad he hasn't left me. 

I will never bring any more cats into my life. It's too damn painful.

I'm not sorry Lafayette was here. I just hoped that we'd grow old together. He went away much too soon.

~Cie~

Updates

 

I have updated the Otherworldly Love and Tarot Readings pages. Please check them out.

~Cie~

Beautiful Music With Cultural Consciousness

I just discovered this band. What a wonderful world view they have! Please check out their music and support them if you can.

Peace,

Helena

Soul Stripper

Lafayette

July 17 2009 - July 17 2015

My best friend in this damn shitty world died Friday. He was six years old. His kidneys shut down, and my son and I agreed that it would be best for him to be released rather than having to endure costly treatments that wouldn't buy him more than a week. He was a very sick little guy, but very brave to the end. If you want to read what happened in detail, I've published a post here. I honestly didn't know how sick he was.

This post is going to be long, rambling and ranty. It isn't going to be full of sunshine or unicorns farting rainbows. If you have a problem with long, ranty, rambling posts short on sunshine, unicorns, or rainbow farts, this is your cue to exit. 

Anyone who sees the need to tell me that I need to be more positive, think more positive, or anything else of that nature needs to realize that you are a sanctimonious ass and you need to not tell others how to think or feel. I've more than enough of your kind of person in my life.

I am a very angry person overall, and life hasn't done much to make me less angry. It seems that every time I find something that softens my heart, the powers that be conspire to take it away.

Now, here is the difference between my mother and me.

I'm pretty sure this plane is purgatory. I've developed this belief over a lifetime of being kicked in the teeth at every turn. You don't have to join me in my belief. I will never say that anyone has to believe what I do.

I have stated that I am an angry person. I probably qualify as bitter, although I try not to be hateful. In spite of being angry and bitter, I actually am capable of caring. Sometimes I care quite a lot.

I loved Lafayette more than I love just about any other creature on this planet. I was the one person that he really trusted. His love for me was innocent and unconditional. That kind of thing doesn't come along every day, and I let this little creature into my heart.

When he died, I was utterly devastated. I wondered how I could have missed the fact that he was so sick. Logically, I know why. I'm currently working two jobs. I'm trying to pay off massive amounts of debt, mostly vehicle related. I'm helping my son, who is unable to work due to severe anxiety and depression. I'm just trying to keep afloat.

It wasn't until Thursday that I was aware that Lafayette was having trouble eating and drinking, and I made an appointment to take him to the vet. 

He was much sicker than I thought, and there was nothing that could be done.

I ended up talking to my mother, whose comfort came in the forms of statements such as this.

"This is why I won't have animals."

Yeah...thank you for letting me know I'm an idiot. I was already aware, actually.

"Things like this happen so we can form callouses on our souls."

My response was "because that's what I really needed is more callouses on my soul. Look, I already resigned myself a long time ago to the fact that nothing good is ever going to happen to me. What the hell more does the Universe want?"

I wondered if this tragedy came to me because I recently got a new job and I was happy about it. It seems that I can't have anything good happen without having something really shitty happen in return.

"Well," my mother said, "we have to pay for what we get."

"Yeah, but this is completely out of line," I said. "This sort of thing is worth a vehicle breakdown or something of that nature, not something utterly tragic."

"Oh, you don't want car problems," she said.

Well, I'd much rather have car problems than to have a creature that meant the world to me die!

Now, in my mother's defense, she comes from a family with a really harsh world view. When her dog got hit by a car when she was in high school, she was devastated. Her grandmother told her "stop crying over that dog. Just think how you'd have felt if it had been your sister."

My great grandmother had a very difficult life and had developed a lot of callouses on her soul. 

Thing is, I honestly don't think this is a good thing.

Somehow this conversation reminded me of the song "Soul Stripper" by AC/DC. Possibly because the band's founder, Malcolm Young, is getting the royal shaft from the Universe himself by having his mind stripped away. If you believe the Satanic Panic shitheads, you believe he deserves this. Please pull your head out of your ass if you believe those fuckwits for even a nanosecond. This man was far from evil and in no way deserves what's happening to him.

In any case, the line that I was reminded of goes like this:

She started moving nice and easy

Slowly getting into my spine

Killing off these nice little feelings

Every one she could find

Granted, the song is about one of those awful, doomed from the start, obsessive romantic attachments. But my mother's statement about forming callouses on one's soul made me think that this is what the miseries of life can do. Eventually enough nice little feelings are killed off that a person becomes cold and hard. 

I may be angry. I may be bitter. But I refuse to be cold and hard. No matter how much it hurts to let myself feel, I will feel. I don't ever want to let my soul be entirely stripped away.

I contemplate suicide often. The only reason I don't do it is because my son still needs me.

Because this is my damn blog and because I love this band, here's Soul Stripper. One of the reasons it sounds so different from a lot of AC/DC's material is because Angus and Malcolm switched who was playing rhythm and who was playing lead. Malcolm really didn't like playing lead, but he was perfectly capable of it. This song was never meant to be a "single." They were having fun, and it shows.

Fun...wish I knew what the hell that was.

~Cie~

Until We Meet Again Little Buddy

Born July 17 2009

Died July 17 2015

I think if one more person tells me I did the right thing by having my best friend euthanized, I'm going to run screaming into the night.

I did the only humane thing. 

He would have been dead before the weekend was out no matter what. My choice simply spared him a few hours to a few days suffering.

When I took him into the vet, I was sure he had a resurgence of feline stomatitis and they'd have to take his remaining teeth.

Instead, I found out that he'd lost more than half his weight and his kidneys had shut down.

Doing three thousand dollars worth of treatment (more than I make in a month even with working two jobs) would have perhaps extended his life by a month or two.

There may come a time when I can think of him and tears don't run from my eyes and my throat doesn't feel like its being shredded by knives while I'm being garroted. But I will never be over this.

Lafayette was the one creature in the world that loved me just the way I am. He loved me and he trusted me. He really didn't trust anyone else the way he trusted me.

When I first brought him home he was very agoraphobic because he had lived at the shelter from the time he was a month old to the time he was eight months old and I adopted him. He hid under the computer table and came out when I was asleep to attack my hand and arm when it would come out from under the covers. My hand and arm was shredded. He wasn't doing it to be mean, he had simply never learned to play appropriately. I took him for his first vet checkup. We got his claws trimmed and I taught him to play with "soft paws." There was no more shredding.

Lafayette always came to greet me when I came in. He wasn't terribly vocal but when the water bulb was going empty, he made sure to let me know. He always liked to be the first to drink the water with the fresh refill. 

Lafayette always came and sat on my shoulder when I lay down. He nuzzled his face against my hand while purring and kneaded the covers and, consequently, my chest, which could sometimes be painful with a thinner cover. He was like a big kitten, although big is something of a misnomer. He only weighed nine pounds.

Today I discovered that he had gone down to five pounds.

Both the vet at the humane society clinic and the one at the emergency clinic where we were referred for potential overnight care said that he didn't have long to live regardless of any heroic measures. Kidney failure is painful. My son and I agreed that he shouldn't have to suffer.

When they brought him into the exam room to say goodbye he tried to meow for us. I think he struggled for much longer than I knew to be brave for me. It was only in this past week that he started giving mournful little meows while looking at the full water dish. He would come up to the sink and meow. I left the faucet dripping a bit, thinking it might be less hard on his mouth to drink from the faucet. 

I really, really wish it had been feline stomatitis.

Lafayette was brought in to the shelter with a feral colony. The kittens were more than likely inbred. Tara, the cat I adopted with him, was from the same colony. She also had to have most of her teeth pulled due to feline stomatitis. She has done very well since. The vet asked if they were related. Initially I said I didn't think so, but after thinking about it I came to the conclusion that they probably were. Tara is two months younger, so they were likely half siblings or cousins.

Lafayette's immune system was never good. He had a high sensitivity to grain. It made his skin scabby and his fur came out in clumps if he ate anything with grain. As I said, he never got very big. He was half the size of my other male cats.

I told Lafayette that he was my best friend and that I loved him and would miss him. We stayed with him, petting and talking to him, while the vet administered the medication to end his suffering.

I feel like someone scooped out my heart and smashed it into a bed of nails, repeatedly.

I know I did the right thing, that is to say, the humane thing.

It doesn't make this pain in my soul go away.

Special note:
When we returned to my son's place, a bee landed on the inside of the open car door. Honeybees are notoriously quick to sting, but this was the mellowest honeybee ever. It sat there for a few minutes cleaning its wings. My son suggested we leave the car window open a crack so it could get out. As I was trying to turn on the car to open the window, the bee flew off. My son said he felt that the bee was a good sign. I said that in some cultures bees are considered psychopomps. Perhaps Lafayette was letting us know that he was okay and appreciated what we'd done for him.

~Cie~

Zen Lawn Mowing

You'll probably find this funny, but I actually find this quick video of a fellow mowing a big lawn soothing. I like the way the mower makes Zen garden patterns as he goes round and round. You'll want to turn the sound down. The wind is less soothing.

~Opal~

Living Off the Grid: Van Dwelling

Thom Hartmann asks: How Could Anyone Be Both Christian and Republican

A must listen. 

Otherworldly Love

Eternal Love by amasarac

 

Otherworldly Love

 

It's time to address a subject which is fairly common in paranormal fiction but which is not covered much in more scholarly metaphysical writing. The subject is relationships (usually romantic) between corporeal and non-corporeal beings.

These relationships can happen between humans and beings such as elementals or angels.* (See disclaimer at the end of the post) This post, however, will specifically address love relationships between incarnate and spectral humans.

Corporeal and non-corporeal people can and do fall in love. Sometimes the relationship was there prior to the departure of the non-corporeal person from the material realm. Other times it happens when the non-corporeal person (hereafter referred to as "ghost") meets and forms a bond with a sympathetic incarnate person with strong enough psychic abilities to interact with him or her.

I am addressing this topic because I imagine that there are other people like myself who, if nothing else, desperately need acknowledgement that they are not alone. Yes, this sort of thing does happen, and it can put you in a very lonely place if you're needing support or advice.

I can offer you support and acknowledgement that you are not alone. Any advice I have is primarily based on personal experience and thus may come with a bias. Further potential questions will be addressed below.

 

I made contact with a ghost. I love talking to him. I'm falling in love with him. He seems to feel the same way. Should I allow this relationship to happen or would it be better to stop it before things go too far?

 

I can't answer this question for you. Only you can make this decision. All I can do is tell you about my personal experiences in this area.

The same difficulties that you might have in a relationship with an incarnate person may arise in a relationship with a spectral person, and they tend to be magnified. In my case, jealousy has been a factor that damaged and eventually destroyed not only my material world marriage but several relationships with discarnate lovers, including my first real love.

I tend to attract abusive men in real life. The discarnate lovers I've attracted are generally not abusive, but every single one of them has been troubled in one way or another.

Content spirits whose lives ended at the proper time are not likely to be hanging around the Earth plane. I do not ascribe to the idea that all spirits who have unresolved issues are malevolent. Spirits are just like incarnate people. Some are benevolent, others are not.

Once you have insured that the spirit you are dealing with is benevolent, only you can make the decision whether a romantic relationship with him or her will be more positive than negative. I do offer Tarot readings which may help shed light on the subject, but in the end, the choice is up to you.

 

You mentioned that you have been romantically involved with spirits. How many?

 

I've had numerous platonic friendships which I still maintain. Romantic involvements, of which there have been nine, include incarnate people with whom I've had a bond on an astral level, which is a different subject but I include it here because it can have a significant impact on a person's life.

 

Wow! Did these all end badly?

 

Most of them. Some of them just ran their course. As I said before, I don't do relationships well.

 

Are you currently involved with a spirit?

 

Yes.

 

Can you tell me something about him or her? Do you think things will turn out better this time?

 

I think things will be better this time because I've learned a lot. My relationship with Gem is different than it ever was with any other spirit. He tries very hard to let me know he's with me. He is extremely gentle. He gives off a warm energy when he touches me.

We've had arguments because of my jealousy. He actually pushes back more than some of my previous involvements. He won't put up with my accusing him of things he hasn't done. He's extremely sensitive, and I hate hurting him. We talked things out and it made our bond stronger.

I wasn't expecting a romantic involvement with Gem. I was very open to contact with him, but I figured our bond would be platonic. I'd made a pact with myself to never again be involved with a spirit after the five year long bond I had with my previous love, Tore, ended acrimoniously back in 2011.

Gem really needed someone to talk to. I knew I could trust him so I let him in when he asked. Yes, ghosts are like vampires. They can't come in unless you invite them. The exception is with a place where they resided or spent a lot of time in life.

Gem started spending a lot of time with me. In less than a week, I became aware that his feelings for me were more than platonic, which surprised me and terrified me because I knew I could easily fall in love with him if I let myself.

I talked to him about the feelings I was sensing from him because I knew that he had been involved with the same person for many years. He said that she was ready to be done with him. He was very ill in the last years of his life. He said that she was sick of taking care of him and that the bond, while strong, had never been particularly passionate.

He is literally the only one that I would have broken my "never again" rule for. I don't regret it, but it's been challenging because of my trust issues.

Gem is actually good friends with my first spectral love, Bel. This made things a bit awkward, but it was more humorous than truly problematic. We're all good friends with each other, and Bel supports Gem and me wholeheartedly.

 

I want a ghost lover! How can I get one?

 

I would advise not directly looking for a spectral lover. Putting this vibration into the Universe will be likely to attract predatory spirits and lower astral entities.

If you wish to communicate with spirits in general, this is fine. You need to take measures to protect yourself. There are many good articles on this subject.

None of my relationships were planned. They were all spirits (or, in some cases, bonds with incarnate people on an astral level) who were seeking assistance, and I offered my assistance.

 

How do you communicate with your lover? Do you have sex with him?

 

I am primarily clairsentient or empathic. I sense his emotions. I receive images from him. I really enjoy writing with him. He is a very creative personality and he loves the fact that he found an obsessive writer to bond with.

Yes, we do have sex. It's different than it would be if we were both incarnate or if we were both spectral. It's also different with him than it was with anyone before him, because he really focuses his intent on making it a beautiful experience for me. He's a very gentle soul, and this translates well when we make love.

The most important thing, however, is not the sex. It's the emotional bond that we have each other. We love each other and try to make each other happy.

 

I feel like I've formed a bond with the spirit of a famous person. Is this possible?

 

Yes, but this is one you have to be really careful with, even more so than if your spectral intended is Jane Plain or Joe Blow. The more famous the person, the more likely that it is actually a lower astral entity or succubus/incubus pretending to be them.

Is said famous person really enjoying playing the astral field with multiple incarnate people? Possibly, but probably not. Spirits tend to be more honest than incarnate people. Benevolent spirits also have a moral code about not wanting to bring harm to vulnerable incarnate folk.

Also, unless you are dealing with an unrecovered sex addict, most spirits really are not interested in sex with numerous incarnate partners. Dealing with incarnate people can be exhausting. It would be far easier to simply find other like-minded spirits to get busy with.

It is possible for multiple empaths (clairsentients) to receive a Soul Call from a discarnate famous person with unresolved issues. Again, the more famous the person the more likely that you are receiving a Soul Call rather than a come-on to be their lover.

Any benevolent spirit will understand reluctance to jump right into a liaison which could potentially harmful to their incarnate intended. A benevolent spirit will never try to pressure you into a romantic bond or sex. If you are feeling pressure of this nature, then the spirit is not who they say they are and you need to take measures to protect yourself.

Another frustration with involvement with a famous person in spirit is the fact that revealing your bond will open you to ridicule and possible threats from others. Unless you find someone you can really trust, you can never talk about it with anyone, even in the more open-minded communities. I learned the hard way about this one!

 

So you've been involved with the spirit of a famous person?

 

Yes. I don't feel comfortable disclosing details.

 

You mentioned that you do Tarot readings?

 

Yes. I do a basic Celtic Cross reading at $25 flat rate for either a general reading or one specific question. If you'd like a reading, leave your email in the contacts and I'll get in touch with you. I'm in the process of making a page I can direct potential clients to.

 

Can you help me communicate with my spectral friend/beloved?

 

I am only able to communicate with spirits that contact me directly. I don't feel confident in my skills as a go-between type of medium. If any readers know a medium whose skills they'd recommend, please leave their details in the comments.

 

Any other helpful ideas?

 

If you have even an inkling that you may be a psychic sensitive or empathy, you can join the Empath Support community. It's a small place, but I'd like to see it grow. (I'm not a moderator or creator, just a member.)

I'm thinking about starting a community for people with otherworldly friends and lovers, but I know it would be a lot of work keeping out the riff-raff who want to belittle those who feel they've had this experience. It's a possibility for the future.

 

Wow! You must be really special to have all this knowledge!

 

More like really old, and I'm hardly omniscient. I'm just a very flawed soul who has been on a long strange trip. It takes a lot of courage for me to share what I've shared here.

I'm finally taking back the power that I've allowed others to steal from me over the years. I'd like for others who are going through some of the things that I went through mostly alone to feel as though they have support.

I may have more experience than some of you but that does not make me a "better" person. We are all equal and we all have things to teach each other.

 

This page is a work in progress. More will be added as I think of it!

 

Love and Light,

Cie

 

*My statement about romantic bonds between angels and incarnate humans is not evidence that I support canon Destiel, as I do not. My dislike for Destiel does not mean that I am a homophobe or biphobe, it simply means that I don't like Destiel. Sometimes a cigar is just a cigar.

If you're wondering what Destiel is, it's a ship between the Supernatural characters Dean Winchester and the angel Castiel. I actually don't have a problem with the ship itself. What I do have a problem with is the obsessive behavior of some of its devotees, who try to force this ship on others and who harass and threaten those who aren't keen on it, including Jensen Ackles, the actor who plays Dean Winchester.

This page is not the place to discuss shipping, Supernatural or otherwise. I only bring it up because I've had issues with these "Destiehellers" on my own Supernatural fan blog. They cling to the slightest "evidence" that "Destiel will be canon," and I feared that my statement about romantic unions between incarnate humans and angelic beings could be taken as such "evidence" if one of them happened upon this page.

Yes, they are bad enough that I feel the need for a pre-emptive strike, however vague the possibility that they may manifest here.