Sacrifice

Photoshop manipulation by Yours Truly

One of my favorites, as it happens

I had a dream which I'm going to do a half-assed job of interpreting. Dream interpretation has never been my strong suit, so I can't promise I'll be good or accurate. I'm partly leaving this here for future reference because I would like to know if I have any precognitive abilities left. Due to overwork and circumstances which lead me to doubt if I ever had any psychic abilities to speak of in the first place, my precognitive abilities have declined over the years.

Thus, I am not saying that this dream was precognitive, but I am curious as to whether it might have some element thereof. The dream is a bit of a mixed bag, leading me to believe that it is partially psychic in nature and partially simply a revelation of my own psyche.

The dream had two components: a group of people watching events unfold on a movie screen, and the events themselves. Both were reality, although the people watching the events on the movie screen were not aware that the events transpiring were reality.

The events transpiring on the screen depicted a dystopian future involving both a group of people fighting to preserve what was left of their society safe from an army intent on takeover and suppression of the people. The other component was a zombie apocalypse, possibly brought about by biological warfare enacted by the invading army.

As zombies were splattered and various people from both armies died, the audience members viewing the events cheered.

The audience members cheered loudly when they saw that two members of the rebel faction were people that they recognized and generally liked: the two fellows depicted above.

The Young brothers were utilizing a piece of construction equipment as transport. It couldn't go very fast, but it could scoop up or crush zombies, and, to a degree, it provided protection from bullets.

The glass, however, was not bulletproof. Malcolm was struck by a bullet and killed. Angus, who had previously been quite enthusiastic about their mission, was in shock, attempting to revive his fallen companion. 

The audience did not cheer at this event.

The audience reaction can be summed up by a statement made by Nivek Ogre (Kevin Ogilvie) of Skinny Puppy in a 1982 interview with Mike Gitter of RIP Magazine.

"Violence is a fundamental fear in today's society," Ogre states, his attention half on the video-game caveman he's putting through its paces. "We see how close violence is, and yet it still seems quite distanced. We're all trying to come to terms with violence, with death, with pain. I think everybody's interested in at least getting close enough to rationalize it and deal with it within their lives."

How would he deal with real violence, say a car crash or a murder, right before his very eyes?

"Totally, totally differently," Ogre admits. "That's a whole different set of emotions. We did an experiment on the last tour, because we've always been accused of celebrating violence for idiotic reasons. We used some images in our show from a film called Guinea Pig. They're these incredibly realistic, but simulated, Japanese snuff films. We inserted them into this roller-coaster ride of violent images and people were quite disgusted. People were vomiting in front of the stage. People came up to me after the show, saying I was the most disgusting human being-until they found out what it was all about. The whole reason we did that was to see if there was a difference. Will people react differently to something that's real as opposed to something they know is staged? They will. There's a whole different set of emotions people go through. It doesn't look like it looks on TV. It's quite sickening."

When the audience saw a person whom they cared about (to varying degrees) die, it was shocking to them. Suddenly, the movie was no longer fun.

This dream was not entirely social commentary, however. On a personal level, I've felt connected to these people since I was young. When I was being bullied and not doing too well, I would think of them and it would give me reason to go on. I liked them because, like me, they were not "normal." They weren't conventionally attractive and they were oddballs. Like me, Malcolm was painfully shy. They were rejects and yet they managed to overcome, which made me feel like perhaps I could too.

The relationship between Malcolm and Angus Young was very close both on an emotional and a psychic level. Angus has said things indicating that they were able to communicate telepathically. They encouraged one another's strengths and balanced each other's weaknesses. Some people felt that their bond made them insular and paranoid. To me, they always seemed to be two halves of one soul.

Angus seems lost without his brother. He keeps going, but it's as if he's on autopilot. There is no joy in his actions, where I used to feel that he was one of the most authentically happy people I had ever seen. He has never been a Pollyanna, as the things he has said over time indicate that he fully realizes that the world is full of really terrible things and that people are capable of doing awful things to each other. However, he managed to share the joy that he felt playing music and performing with the world and made it a bit of a better place for a while.

The expression I saw on Angus' face in the dream was heartbreaking. It was the look of a person whose world had been destroyed and they can't understand why they are still here.

Malcolm Young is dying. It doesn't take psychic ability to realize that. The disease he has kills people slowly. It adds insult to injury by destroying their cognitive abilities in the process. It is, honestly, worse than death. Were I to find out that I had dementia, I would take myself out before it had a chance to rob me of my connections in this world--before it had a chance to rob me of myself. I would rather die just about any other way.

I think this dream was a combination of my emotional and possibly psychic connection to Angus and Malcolm Young. I sensed their emotions, particularly the devastation. I think about them a lot. I wish I could heal them, but I do not have that power. There is nothing I can do.

To me, people seem a callous lot overall, as indicated by the reactions of the audience. When I start feeling this way, I remind myself of the wisdom in the words of Nivek Ogre. People enjoy spectacle, but most people are appalled by real cruelty. However, most people are also oblivious to just how much cruelty is happening every day in the world.

That was my dream experience and my analysis thereof. It seemed like one I should pay attention to, but as tends to be the case these days, I'm not entirely sure that I got the message.

~Cie~

Image by The Real Cie