With all the compassion, lack of knowledge or any semblance of thought it has been suggested to me that during a recent chest infection, wrongly diagnosed at first as being Gastroenteritis, that I not only sought attention but in-all-likelihood ‘laid it on with a trowel.’
Three things here. First, the chest infection was unpleasant but nothing more than that. It’ll take more than that to have me running to A&E.
Secondly, I am a long time diabetic who, after thirteen years of trying to cure my own panic attacks and depression (common among long-time sufferers). I have been prescribed Amitriptyline, and have agreed to attend therapy. Buddhism is probably the world's forerunner of managing the mind.
Thirdly, due to a combination of factors, some of my own making it should be said, I ate insufficiently for eleven days leaving me feeling a little weak and a little light headed. My sugar controls are all over the place. This, not the chest infection, not my panic attacks, but my diabetes which should be of major concern.
It will be remembered that in 2004 I had a heart attack and during the initial stages drove myself to the hospital. No blues and twos. The second attack was different. Secondly, in 2015 I had two strokes. Again, with as little fuss as possible although with hindsight a great deal of stupidity, I took myself into A&E, on one occasion as, and to quote myself, ‘I don’t like making a fuss,’ whilst on the second occasion the man I work with drove me there much alarmed as we had just completed a mornings work.
I have had, as a child, and up to the age thirty, innumerable seizures. So many I couldn’t hazard a guess. Neither they, not heart attacks, nor strokes, nor cold’s, influenza or any other damn sickness kept me down for long. But now I stand accused of being lazy and not cleaning the house all because I took my Squid out. It was a horrible experience. I barely made the climb up the stairs to the café she loves so much. I didn’t go out for myself as I would rather have laid in bed. I did it for her.
And now, as I try my level best to practise what I preach, to spread a little love, I am made to feel the acid hate of another thrown at me.
1 comment:
I'm sorry to hear about this. I hate it when people accuse those suffering of "seeking attention." What a terrible thing to accuse someone of.
Of all the people I know, you seem far from being an "attention seeker" of any kind.
I hope you get better soon, and I will try and refrain from bewitching those accusing you of "seeking attention" during this ailment.
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